My first week of teaching went really badly.
Monday, I felt like I was just running around getting everything ready. School didn’t start until Tuesday, but I had to get my classroom set up in some way that looked presentable, and I had a mountain of curriculum in my room, which I was trying to go through and understand. I also had to run over to my house to be there when the gas company stopped by to turn the natural gas on. Open house was Monday evening, and I met a few parents of my students and a few of my students.
The first day, did an activity to go over rules, and rehearsed procedures – we practiced getting in line a few times, with a stopwatch. I thought we could go to recess after lunch, but it turns out that we couldn’t, because the construction on the roof meant that we couldn’t go on the playground. At the end of the day, we had a bit of down time and the students started to get a little rowdy. To me, it seemed like this was happening because I didn’t have enough planned. I still don’t have internet at my house, so I spent most of the evening camped out in a coffeeshop, writing my lesson plan for Wednesday, trying to get enough stuff packed into my day.
I got home that night, and my house smelled really strongly of natural gas. I opened windows and texted my mom about it. My mom called me, freaking out about the natural gas smell, and telling me that I should leave my windows open.
Wednesday, I went to school and it went badly and I felt awful about it. The school counselor sat in on my room for the second half of the day, and helped me rearrange my classroom in a way that used the space better, which was really helpful.
At the end of the day, my roommate told me that when the person from the gas company stopped by, they said the air in our house was 8% gas, and that you can have an explosion at 5%.
Thursday was rough, really rough. Someone else was in my room for almost the entire day, and it became this trend, where my students would behave when anyone else was in the room, then everyone would lose it the second it was just me and them. My principal asked if I’d be up for switching to second grade. There are 29 second graders in one class, and my class and the other third grade class, combined had 23 students. I said that I’d like to switch to second grade.
On Friday, the other third grade teacher and I combined our classes in her classroom. It was better, but not where I’d want it to be at all.
I’m worried that everyone in my school thinks that I’m going to quit, based on how the first week went. I’m worried they think that I’m terrible.
The bright spot, in all of this, has been the willingness of everyone around me to offer advice, resources, and support. Without me even asking, everyone in my school has offered advice and everyone I know who has a background in education has reached out to me. I’ve never felt like there were this many people who were doing what they can to help me out. Everyone has so much empathy – they know how hard it is, and how often you feel like you’re a failure in that first year. I appreciate everyone so much, for sending me all the love and support in the world.